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killzonly
post Jan 23 2010, 12:46 AM
Post #1


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
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Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




Progress:
Spoiler:
Overall:25%
Maps: 1% (Need some good mappers)
Scripts: 99.5% (Room for improvement)
Sprites: 78.5% (NPCs)
Story: 60% (Still some gaps)
Database: 75% (Not so good with parameters)



Intro: Ichi Kakashi, a former Kijutsu Arts Academy student, sets out on an unexpected adventure. After being seized by rogues at the Jishin City Arena, he and the friends he's made find out about a global conspiracy to resurrect a forgotten cult called the Mataski. Ichi and his Shinobi team of misfits travel to forgotten temples, never-ending caverns, vast seas, dense swamps and forests, hazardous deserts, and mountains all to track down the group of Mataski that are closer than one might think.

Story:

Spoiler:
In the quiet city of Ryoku, Earth Nation, a boy named Ichi Kakashi was born and raised in the loving arms of his mother. Ichi is a very narrow-minded person with a good sense of humor. He and his best friend Kayo Shinomara have been training all of their young lives at the world famous Kijutsu Arts Academy to one day become great shinobi. With the Jishin Battle for Earth tournament fast approaching, Ichi must train harder than ever!

Ichi decides to form a Team (a group of shinobi that travel together) with his friend Kayo. At this point there is a gap in main story, but really what takes place is Ichi completing small quests and exploring the Ryoku Forest. Arriving at Jishin, Southern Earth Nation, would be no easy feat. Ichi must first navigate through the Ryoku Forest, which would be easy, but due to an abrupt landslide, things have become rather messy. Another twist of fate happens when the Southern Road (the direct path to Jishin) has collapsed under a caved-in mountain pass. Ichi is forced upwards to the Northern Farming District where he meets up with his sensai and takes a breather.

From the district, Ichi travels south through a winding mountain chain and deep caverns, eventually arriving at the outer limits of Jishin. The tournament is a tedious one. Ichi must first show a series of judges his skills as a shinobi. If he passes, he trains for an additional 3 days, in which he makes an new friend. On the 2nd free day, Ichi needs to run a small errand for his sensai to pick up some tea leaves in town. As he begins to leave, a mysterious man bumps into him. Man: "Hey, kid, watch where you're going!"; Ichi: "Excuse me?!"--the man slips something into Ichi's pocket and takes off. Immediately, an Arena Guard stops Ichi. Guard: "Stop right there, thief!"; Ichi: "What?!";Guard: "Are you the one who stole the 'Letter'?"; Ichi: "No, what letter?"; Guard: "LIAR! Don't play stupid with me!--the guard attacks Ichi in the square. Once Ichi defeats her, he tells the guard what happened. The guard seems suspicious at first, but soon agrees. She tells Ichi that her name is Ayame and asks Ichi if she could travel in his team. Ichi laughs and turns towards Ayame..."Ha, I guess I do need another partner to compete in the tournament..."

*Note: This is the most filled in parts of the story, but there's waaaay more! This should set a good example of the game without revealing too much! biggrin.gif Pardon me for my bad story telling!


Crappy Screenshots:
Spoiler:



WARNING THESE TERRIBLE MAPS MAY CAUSE BRAIN DAMAGE!


Characters:
Spoiler:
Main Characters:


Ichi
Age: 14 Male
Main Character
Tribe: Earth
Weapon:Swords
Ichi grew up all of his life in the small city of Ryoku, Earth Nation. His best friend is Kayo Shinomara, an archer. Together they have trained and adventured as best friends. Ichi is only 14 so he has awhile to go in life. Although he is responsible, he is very anxious and determined to one day become a Roychimaru.


Kayo
Age: 15 Male
Friend
Tribe: Earth
Weapon:Archery
Best friends with Ichi Kakashi, Kayo has lead a troubled life. He was abused by his father as a small child and was never really accepted by others. Although he has a bright spirit, something about him seems sad.


Ayame
Age: 18 Female
Ally/Guard
Tribe: Earth
Weapon: Axes
Ayame has led a life full of confusion. She grew up in a rich family with loving parents, but at the age of 7, catastrophe struck! On her return from the sage fields, she saw her home ablaze. Her mother was rushed to an herbalist in Jishin to the south, but her father was killed in the fire. For years, Ayame couldn't locate her mother, she lived off of the land, stole from farmers, and wandered slowly towards Jishin to stay alive. She soon found herself in Jishin's streets, begging for money and sometimes stealing it. She found her mother in a small apartment outside of the Emperor's castle. She had found work as a servant to the Emperor and managed to live from the small squanderings. Ayame, as well, found work for the Emperor, she became a guard. She didn't like the job, but it was all she had. By 17, she was still a low level security guard for the Jishin Arena, and yet another mishap occured in her life. Her mother was diagnosed with the STIGMA*. *An uncommon, yet deadly disease that attacks the carrier's brain and muscle tissue. She managed to keep her mother alive by spending her wages not on food for herself, but for medication for her mother. And so, her life continued...


Chisoku
Age: 19 Male
Ally/Rebel
Tribe: Star
Weapon:Chantlets (a small pin thrown to kill)
As a boy with no parents, Chisoku was raised in the Nation of the Stars at a temple of monks. With advanced agility and "minute weapons" training he became a well-known shinobi in the Nation. Soon Chisoku proceeded to learn the art of Chantleting, or throwing pins. He was a master, but things change. One day after training at the nearby Lake of the Sky, he heard an uproar in his village. He ran back to find that his Master had been slain by an unknown assassin of the Mataski. He decided it would be best to kill the assassin and gain revenge, but upon slaying the assassin, he killed an innocent bystander of the village in his rage. He was exiled from the temple and the village. He moved to a remote location in the forest to live out the rest of his life in sorrow...


Yumi
Age: 21 Female
Ally/Love Interest
Tribe: Star
Weapon:Shuriken


Hinote
Age: 17 Male
Ally/Iki Master
Tribe: Sun
Weapon:Staff

[No Image Available]

Tae (TAY - ə)
Age: 16 Female
Enemy/Ally/Iki Master
Tribe: Ice
Weapon:Mystics (small trinkets used with Iki to change an element)


Xai
Age: Unknown Male
Ally/Cool "Big Brother"
Tribe: Sun
Weapon:Firearms


MR. E
Age: Unknown Male
Ally/Con-artist
Tribe: Ice
Weapon:Cloaks

Scripts and Features:

Highlights:
-Takentai SideView NEO Battle System
-Quest Journal
-Day/Night Time Script
-Character Bios Menu
-Integrated Items
-Integrated Skills
-Party Changer
-Integrated Shops
-Multi-Save System w/ NEO
-CheckPoint GameOvers
-And much more! PM me for a full list!

World Overview:

Spoiler:
Ichi starts in Ryoku, a north-eastern city of the Earth Nation. This game relies on multiple world mapped synchronized together (for now). You go on to fight in the Jishin Tournament in the southern areas of the Earth Nation. Once kidnapped, you are taken to a dangerous forest populated by thieves' guilds. As you travel through the Nation of the Sun, you learn of conspiracies regarding the Ancients. You MUST head west from this point to avoid capture from the Earth Nation's Military Enlisters. After taking a long path through a maze-like cavern, you emerge at a small Balloon port. You may take the balloon across to a series of islands (optional) or to the Nation of the Stars. The story becomes very holey here so I'll will stop, but that's why we need writers!!!


My Email if your interested! fallengamer@ymail.com

Needed:

Writers: The story is okay-ish but it needs some serious work!
-ninjaknife10
-Kojiko7
-
Mappers: I'm an Intermediate mapper, but to make the estimated 300 maps would kill me!
-narpassword000
-
-
Pixel Artists (Animations, Tiles, Charsets, etc.): Any level is okay! Just include a picture of your skills in the PM or email!
-
-
-
QuestScripters (Quest Journal Scripts): Writers are needed to fill out forms in script form for Quests in the game.
-
-
Databasers: Writers are needed to fill out Items, Swords, Skills, Script details, etc.
-
-
-
Musicians/Artists (BattleBacks, Music, etc.): I found some okay music, but if you can make/find music try out for this position!
-marcopolonian
Parameter Balancers: Writers are needed to even out the parameters of Actors, Items, Skills, Weapons, etc.
-
-
Hopefully, this is enough info, if you want more, just post it! I'll try to take away some time from my homework to write more!

This post has been edited by killzonly: Mar 7 2010, 03:25 PM


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killzonly
post Jan 23 2010, 04:33 AM
Post #2


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
Group Icon


Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




Wait, can I bump now or should I wait 48 hours? But I really need a team to start forming!

>>Uhhhhh.... BUMP!

This post has been edited by killzonly: Jan 23 2010, 04:34 AM


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killzonly
post Jan 26 2010, 10:08 PM
Post #3


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
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Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




BUMP --> Getting lonely!


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RuGeaR1277
post Jan 27 2010, 12:54 AM
Post #4



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Type: Undisclosed




well, just letting you know, i read it... =\

anyway, your maps are huge!
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Kojiko7
post Jan 27 2010, 01:01 AM
Post #5


++MS Paint Sage++ Taking it another Level
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Type: Artist
Alignment: Chaotic Good




hmm i read it's kidda cool but too over japanese hmm.. (sry ) I mean um can you make it a bit like FF7 i mean not exact but the story, place is japs put a few char with ENG named (juz an idea ) Do u had plot all the story line frm start till end?


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killzonly
post Jan 27 2010, 02:53 AM
Post #6


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
Group Icon


Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




That one map of the Super-mega area was to get the just of it, it will be redone and divided into smaller sections! The names of these characters aren't for sure yet, these are just the Japanese versions, they will be changed soon! I do have a plot from start to end, but it is VERY long, so I've been chipping away at it everyday with Microsoft Office Word. I hope I can get it done! laugh.gif

P.S. --> I LOVE FFVII!!!!! cool.gif

This post has been edited by killzonly: Jan 27 2010, 02:58 AM


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ninjaknife10
post Jan 27 2010, 03:08 AM
Post #7


Doesn't it suck when your toothpaste gets all dried up?
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Type: Writer
Alignment: Chaotic Evil




I can do a bit of story, which I'm fairly good with. I'm devoting a tom of time, though I am intrigued by the project. Here is feedback

1. Storyline is quite solid, I believe it will turn out well.

2. Names of character too japanesish like the other guy said.

3.I was wondering if you were considering a series. I think it's a catchy name, which would be the reason to keep the names.


P.S: Is there an ending planned? biggrin.gif Just wondering, you don't have to tell me what it is. laugh.gif


--------------------


\Olny 55% of plepoe can raed this.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
fi yuo cna raed tihs, palce it in yuor siantugre.


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Kojiko7
post Jan 27 2010, 08:08 AM
Post #8


++MS Paint Sage++ Taking it another Level
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Type: Artist
Alignment: Chaotic Good




Yea a sequel is a good idea hmm I'll do some brain storming tonight bout da char name and a bit twist on d storyline huhu


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killzonly
post Jan 27 2010, 09:40 PM
Post #9


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
Group Icon


Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




I am going to update the names for SOME of them. Some are actually Asian, like Yuffie from Wutai (FF7), but there is a problem. For some reason all of the pages on this site are very, very distorted...All of the writing is nearly 5 size!!! YAY, okay, now its fixed! Anyway, I do have an ending planned for the game, and there is a big twist, but I am having trouble coming up with the suspense leading up to it... mad.gif

--> I am going to update the names!

QUOTE
I can do a bit of story, which I'm fairly good with. I'm devoting a tom of time, though I am intrigued by the project. Here is feedback


Do you want to be a writer, because I could really use some help filling in the storyline!



This post has been edited by killzonly: Jan 27 2010, 09:58 PM


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Kojiko7
post Jan 27 2010, 11:12 PM
Post #10


++MS Paint Sage++ Taking it another Level
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Alignment: Chaotic Good




Gomenasai..!! huhu sry2 chill out
Why do you change Kayo's name into James?? no good...huhu i like it better Kayo
I know what your saying about their name and of course a shinobi fit for asian name anyway
Anyway i'm just tryin to help you out give out some idea

Epiloq- Ichi and kayo were on the way to the Arena-> on their way they saved Sarisa which is badly injured fought with Mataski rogue (later on i'll post out bout Sarisa- one of the Resistance leader againts Mataski) Anyway she'd been saved and currntly hide in Ichi place.There's where Ichi got caught up with the problem..
He wasn't sure to help out Sarisa or gave her up to the Legion army bacause the resistance troops were declare as rebels or something like that..
probably the legion also under Mataski influence no one know huhu

i gotta an idea of changing the name a bit =The 8 Sealed Army of Mataski tongue.gif

**pls don't use any earth nation or whatever common elemental named Sry but it sounded kindda avatar Its ok to use it's that i got bored already reading the same thing from manga to anime.**

*series of names
Daiga
Seto
Umezawa
Ken
Amaki
Fumiya
Saito
Sakuraba
Yuura
Shindo
Yuji
Ebaki
Kaylen
Dokuya

The main char probably no need to be the same as the title.

Chikara=(its kindda girlish name, Sry) why don't make it a female char? It'll be a female guard with the same background about herself
I'm just kindda lost why off the sudden Chikara would like to join up with Ichi. You probably can make umm somthing that related to Chikara like.. he join up bacause want to find up what's really happen to his family. Well like in your default storyline Ichi run a small errand for his sensai to pick up some tea leaves in town. As he begins to leave, a mysterious man bumps into him.
Man: "Hey, kid, watch where you're going!";
Ichi: "Excuse me?!"--the man slips (something into Ichi's pocket and takes off)
Probably can make the mysterious man is accually a clan member of the Mataski whom were order to set a trap to Ichi off by 'accidentlly' gave Ichi a letter -the letter tell the Mamber of Mataski the meeting set up place- put a plot here what's related to Ichi that led to his bounty

Chikara on that moment saw the event as he already were already followed the mysterious man Because he reconize the face,the feature it reminded him of the last person stand own of his burning house with a flaming sword . He doesn't know him and wants to know if what he think is true. The mysterious person are already knew that Chikara were watch him all the time so he had to flee quickly juz before Chikara approch him He quickly ran off Ichi and gave out the letter . The Mataski seal on the letter caught Chikara attention(on the day his house were burn a rogue body A Mataski emblem tatoo in his face) , instead of going after the mysteriuos man he swing his sword to Ichi hoping for an answer.(he fought with fist accually sry mistaken)

So after the fight->Ichi tell the truth->he join up party with Ichi to find out the secret hidout probably can get the answr.
*I also have an idea that the mysterious guy is accually a friend to Chikara's father whom were fighting rogue of Mataski the day that the house got burned down (who is accually Chikara's father? why the mataski tried to kill him anyway??)But Chikara's father didnt survive the attack accept for his friend.
Nevertheless the mysterious man swone oath to revenge and work as a spy in the Mataski (which is getting weirder and weirder and crappy LoL sry juz another idea)

btw!! a female guard is still a good idea Its reminded me of Tifa ff7 (fr some wat reason)huhu
Yura
Reda
Mikuno
Akari
Jeanna
Hera
Ayame

can you change the Mr E to another name?
p/s this is just an ideas I gave out since i got bored nothing to do n sry for my bad ENG n this crappy long reply huhu


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killzonly
post Jan 28 2010, 01:08 AM
Post #11


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
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Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




Well, I really like your rewrite of "Chikara", but he is to stay a male... I will change his name to something more masculine, and replace the guard with a female instead... I agree though that Kayo should not be James, it will be changed back. Although, MR. E will stay the same for sensible reason. MR.E is a master of disguises and his true identity is a "mystery" --> Mister E? Get it? You see, when you first meet him, he is disguised as an old man, then on the second appearance as a woman, and for the third: a guard. He is the most elusive optional character in the game. And at the 2nd and 3rd meetings, you fight him.

P.S. --> You said at first, that the names were too "japanese". Did you mean to make them American, or to make them more common asian names?

I'm actually going to replace Chikara with a girl, and make his persona as someone else. Although, I will not use gauntlets as her weapons, seeing as how Tifa uses Gloves!

P.S. (Again) tongue.gif I am going to use some of your names, would you like to be a writer? I really love your ideas!
QUOTE
The main char probably no need to be the same as the title.

Ichi means ONE in Japanese, and he is the "one" who is the last of his kind...or so he thinks. That is why his father named him Ichi.

This post has been edited by killzonly: Jan 28 2010, 01:14 AM


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ninjaknife10
post Jan 28 2010, 01:25 AM
Post #12


Doesn't it suck when your toothpaste gets all dried up?
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Type: Writer
Alignment: Chaotic Evil




Yes, I would love to be a writer. Add me!
Where is a gap i could fill?

This post has been edited by ninjaknife10: Jan 28 2010, 01:26 AM


--------------------


\Olny 55% of plepoe can raed this.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
fi yuo cna raed tihs, palce it in yuor siantugre.


I support this project(s)

http://www.rpgmakervx.net/index.php?showto...amp;quot;"]http://www.rpgmakervx.net/index.php?showtopic=12760"[/url]]


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Oceano
post Jan 28 2010, 01:32 AM
Post #13


I Shot The Sheriff
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Type: Designer
Alignment: Unaligned




Crappy Screenshots?
Don't put yourself down like that dude. They look decent.
I don't plan on joining(I have enough to worry about on my project tongue.gif), but I wish you the best of luck happy.gif


--------------------

MISS MAY I
ROSE FUNERAL
EMMURE


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killzonly
post Jan 28 2010, 01:33 AM
Post #14


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
Group Icon


Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




QUOTE (ninjaknife10 @ Jan 27 2010, 07:25 PM) *
Yes, I would love to be a writer. Add me!
Where is a gap i could fill?


Well, let's see. I really need a purpose for this: After the Jishin Tournament, Ichi, Ayame, and Kayo confront a group of men that Ichi had met before. (Story Fill Here) All three are then bound and kidnapped, and soon taken to a hidden prison in the Land of the Sun's northern forest. After doing a series of battles and escapades, the three, instead of returning home, go even further south into a nearby Sun Village. Could you help write what happens when they confronted the gang, and why they stayed in the pirate-ruled islands of the Sun?


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ninjaknife10
post Jan 28 2010, 01:37 AM
Post #15


Doesn't it suck when your toothpaste gets all dried up?
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Type: Writer
Alignment: Chaotic Evil




SORRY ACCIDENTLY GOT THE NAMES MIXED UP!! SWITCH ISHI WITH THE OTHER CHARACTER HE IS TRAVELING WITH UNLESS YOU LIKE IT THIS WAY!!
Should I just post it here, or email you, or pm you?(I will do the writing thing)

I put it in two versions. My dialogue version and the general version so if you don't like the personality you can change it, or tell me to change it. One being exact and one being flexible. First draft for the first one, second one will be up soon.

Why They Get Nabbed
Dialogue version:

(Begins when they confront the gang of people Ishi has met before.

Main
(whispering) Ishi, who are they?

Ishi
(whispering) There the Tiger Grade(I'm not good with names) I was with them a few years ago.

(Screen flashes, screen black and white, heartbeat in background(it's not that big of a deal if you can't do that) Outskirt area of town. Screen scrolls up to the “Tiger Grade” surrounding a man. He is old. Probably use the default old guy in People. He says a couple words of plea as they enclose on him.

Ishi
(Screen goes black) I was one of them, forced by there leader. I wasn't the only one either, plenty were being forced. I was one of the few who escaped. I've put them behind me now, though. Never expected them to find me.

(Back to original scene)

Leader of gang
Is that you, Soulpaw?(sorry, suck at names.) Well, well, well...
I never thought I would see you again. You still owe me a lifetime in the gang.

Ishi
I was not of much use to you, what do you want?

Leader of gang
Get Soulpaw. Nab the other one too so he doesn't go blab to anyone.

Gang closes in and the screen blacks out, fades in in the Sun place.

Event Version:

1.Confront gang

2. Ishi tells a story of how he used to be in the gang, then escaped, showing a flash back of the gang encircling an old man.

3. Back to original scene, Gang leader decides to nab Ishi and Main just because he does not want Main to blab t people.

This post has been edited by ninjaknife10: Jan 28 2010, 02:03 AM


--------------------


\Olny 55% of plepoe can raed this.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
fi yuo cna raed tihs, palce it in yuor siantugre.


I support this project(s)

http://www.rpgmakervx.net/index.php?showto...amp;quot;"]http://www.rpgmakervx.net/index.php?showtopic=12760"[/url]]


I am in or have been in this project(s)

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Kojiko7
post Jan 28 2010, 01:42 AM
Post #16


++MS Paint Sage++ Taking it another Level
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Type: Artist
Alignment: Chaotic Good




LoL Ok np,now you have 2 writer in your project Im accually looking for a project to help with let see wat else I can help with maybe some sprites or battler.
Oh! now i get it bout MR E n yea i was hoping you'd using a common japs name nevermind using the list given
Yea! now we're talking, Ayame chan..!! get a cute girl potrait for Ayame LoL smile.gif
pls post also the plot that you'd written

Probably need your idea also ninjaknife to elaborate the plot on this one Pls contributes idea
Domo Arigato

This post has been edited by Kojiko7: Jan 28 2010, 01:49 AM


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killzonly
post Jan 28 2010, 01:49 AM
Post #17


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
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Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




QUOTE (ninjaknife10 @ Jan 27 2010, 07:37 PM) *
Should I just post it here, or email you, or pm you?(I will do the writing thing)


Just post it here, its easier to edit/critique...

It's still not finished (the plot) but I can sum up a small overview tonight!

This post has been edited by killzonly: Jan 28 2010, 01:51 AM


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Kojiko7
post Jan 28 2010, 02:07 AM
Post #18


++MS Paint Sage++ Taking it another Level
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Type: Artist
Alignment: Chaotic Good




QUOTE (killzonly @ Jan 28 2010, 09:33 AM) *
Well, let's see. I really need a purpose for this: After the Jishin Tournament, Ichi, Ayame, and Kayo confront a group of men that Ichi had met before. (Story Fill Here) All three are then bound and kidnapped, and soon taken to a hidden prison in the Land of the Sun's northern forest. After doing a series of battles and escapades, the three, instead of returning home, go even further south into a nearby Sun Village. Could you help write what happens when they confronted the gang, and why they stayed in the pirate-ruled islands of the Sun?


Do you had done the world map I could use it to visualize even more


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killzonly
post Jan 28 2010, 02:21 AM
Post #19


I cann spel fine: Soo in ur fase!!!
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Type: Designer
Alignment: True Neutral




QUOTE (ninjaknife10 @ Jan 27 2010, 07:37 PM) *
SORRY ACCIDENTLY GOT THE NAMES MIXED UP!! SWITCH ISHI WITH THE OTHER CHARACTER HE IS TRAVELING WITH UNLESS YOU LIKE IT THIS WAY!!
Should I just post it here, or email you, or pm you?(I will do the writing thing)

I put it in two versions. My dialogue version and the general version so if you don't like the personality you can change it, or tell me to change it. One being exact and one being flexible. First draft for the first one, second one will be up soon.

Why They Get Nabbed
Dialogue version:

(Begins when they confront the gang of people Ishi has met before.

Main
(whispering) Ishi, who are they?

Ishi
(whispering) There the Tiger Grade(I'm not good with names) I was with them a few years ago.

(Screen flashes, screen black and white, heartbeat in background(it's not that big of a deal if you can't do that) Outskirt area of town. Screen scrolls up to the “Tiger Grade” surrounding a man. He is old. Probably use the default old guy in People. He says a couple words of plea as they enclose on him.

Ishi
(Screen goes black) I was one of them, forced by there leader. I wasn't the only one either, plenty were being forced. I was one of the few who escaped. I've put them behind me now, though. Never expected them to find me.

(Back to original scene)

Leader of gang
Is that you, Soulpaw?(sorry, suck at names.) Well, well, well...
I never thought I would see you again. You still owe me a lifetime in the gang.

Ishi
I was not of much use to you, what do you want?

Leader of gang
Get Soulpaw. Nab the other one too so he doesn't go blab to anyone.

Gang closes in and the screen blacks out, fades in in the Sun place.

Event Version:

1.Confront gang

2. Ishi tells a story of how he used to be in the gang, then escaped, showing a flash back of the gang encircling an old man.

3. Back to original scene, Gang leader decides to nab Ishi and Main just because he does not want Main to blab t people.


I'm sorry, it's my fault that I didn't explain it better! banghead.gif You see, Ichi sees two of the 5 men in the Ryoku Forest when he first sets out for Jishin! I'm figuring since the men are part of the Mataski, that Ayame would recognize the symbols on their robes...She would be the one to want them to stay in the village to find out more... What do you guys think?


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Kojiko7
post Jan 28 2010, 02:30 AM
Post #20


++MS Paint Sage++ Taking it another Level
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Type: Artist
Alignment: Chaotic Good




QUOTE (killzonly @ Jan 28 2010, 10:21 AM) *
I'm sorry, it's my fault that I didn't explain it better! banghead.gif You see, Ichi sees two of the 5 men in the Ryoku Forest when he first sets out for Jishin! I'm figuring since the men are part of the Mataski, that Ayame would recognize the symbols on their robes...She would be the one to want them to stay in the village to find out more... What do you guys think?


yea that a way to explain it
Ayame saw the emblem of mataski thats the reason they stay (as you were said)
we should put up a few quest hre maybe they had to stayed in the village for a quite while in the moment they were chosen to ally with the mataski (Ichi and d others become the mataski spy) they run a quest which later on i'll think about the story to relate bout the quest
anyway what do you think bout the Sarisa and the resistance troop? can it fit in some how?


**tiger grade = how bout Grandeur -something- which means greatness?? juz an idea
So Ichi is in the Tiger grade once Is it a pirate group? hmm maybe a desert pirate Juz an idea
probably they both kayo and Ichi forced to joined them few years ago (if elaborate more can be more interesting)
Ichi and Kayo must had a dark history
So there 3 part now

1. the mataski
2. the tiger grade
3. the earth nation empire

none of them related??


This post has been edited by Kojiko7: Jan 28 2010, 02:46 AM


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